Daily Venus Diva

Communicating Effectively & Efficiently

Daily Venus Diva — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 05:01:22 +0000

Communicating effectively and efficiently requires that you be aware of what others see and hear and how they respond to you, whether it be face-to-face, over the phone, during a sales call or presentation, conference call, meeting or via technology. You can learn how to communicate effectively no matter where you are. Even your technology-driven communication will improve if you first focus on improving the most important method first — face-to-face communication.

Here are some recommendations:

Increase your awareness. We don’t know what we don’t know. We have this mystery of not knowing what others see and hear when we communicate: over the phone or face-to-face. If you don’t know how you and your message are perceived, you will never make improvements for greater results. Pay attention to your listener. Watch and listen for their reactions and responses. Learn how what you say affects people.

Pause more often! A mistake most of us make is saying more than our listeners want and need to hear. Slow down your speech! Deliberately introduce more PAUSES. What perception do you create when you hear a speaker speaking quickly? PAUSE Or when they clutter their sentences with non-words such as; um, uh, you know, like, but and so on. PAUSE If you want to show you can think on your feet and allow your listeners to understand your message, replace your non-words with a PAUSE. Less is more.

Connect or contact. Who are you talking to? Look and listen for the clues they get what you are saying. With eye connection you gain trust and connect with your listeners. If you talk you must listen more and really hear what the other person is saying. Without the meaningful connection, your listener will lose interest, question your message and have doubts about you.

Confident entrance. Do you walk into a room like you belong there? Within seven seconds others determine if you’re confident or uncertain. Your posture will communicate how you’re feeling without you saying a word. It’s the easiest way to immediately convey confidence yet the quickest way to lose confidence if not done effectively. Stand straight! Recognize your listeners individually by connecting with their eyes. Look people in the eye. Recognize them individually with your face and smile.

Use technology power wisely. Face-to-face communication should not be a lost art. Ask yourself what communication medium to use to best influence action? Choose the most personal form of communication that allows for the most meaningful communication for the situation. Don’t rely on technology, especially with complex or deeply personal communications of importance.

Gesture to create a positive visual impression. When your gestures and speech convey the same information, they’re easier to understand. Confident speakers use their gestures to add emphasis to their words. Avoid fidgeting with your rings, fingers, pen, etc. by expanding your arms from your sides, make the gesture consistent with your message and then bring your arms back to your sides.

Speak to be heard! Your voice is your greatest asset. Do you sound like you mean what you’re saying? The sound of your voice shapes the attitude of your listeners even more than the words you speak. If you want to be perceived as confident, use the 1 – 10 scale. When speaking to a group of 15 or more, you must be at a 7 – 8 on the volume scale. From here, you adjust your volume based on the group and room size. Don’t whisper or talk too low for whatever occasion. Adjust your volume for maximum effect.

Use fear as your motivator. Allow your fear of presenting to propel you forward. Channel you fear into your work. Doubt is good as it raises your awareness so you pay more attention and focus your mind on what is right before you. Fear is the greatest motivator you have. Realize that whatever you focus on becomes more real to you. You therefore can channel and use your capabilities better and do your best to help the people you can help the most.

Speak less and listen more! Pay more attention to your audience. Listening reveals what’s important to your listeners. Talk directly to them and look them in the eyes when you do. YOU are the message. STOP talking to your visual aids; PowerPoint, notes, handouts, etc. Instead, allow your listeners to communicate directly to YOU so that you confirm that they understand your message.

Make discipline your new habit. You need to want it bad enough to begin TODAY making face-to-face communication your priority. Practice doesn’t only make things perfect – practice makes things permanent. Even if all you can do is practice in real time, on the job, on the firing line, ask for constructive feedback on a specific behavior before and after your conversations and presentations.

About the Author: Stacey Hanke is owner of 1st Impression Consulting, Inc. She is a sought after speaker, on the topic of Communication Skills. She is the co-author of Yes You Can! Everything You Need From A-Z To Influence Others To Take Action and Featured author of the book, Conversations On Success, on which she partnered with Chicken Soup for the Soul’s Jack Canfield and Fish Philosophy author John Christensen.

Designer Spotlight: Georges Chakra

News Editor, Cassandra Jones-McBryde — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 04:10:17 +0000

You want to know who has been behind the stunning red carpet looks of Queen Latifah as of late? Meet Georges Chakra, Lebanon born designer who burst onto the runways of Paris Fashion Week in France in 2002. Since then, twice a year he presents an impressive jaw dropping collection that is sought after by the likes of such hollywood notables as Carrie Underwood, Beyonce and Tyra Banks. He has been a favorite of Queen Latifah,having chosen one of his gowns for her latest album cover Most recently,Chakra draped Queen’s curves in soft violet and crystal at 2010 Academy Awards. He proves time and time again that Haute Couture Fashion is not just for the smaller form by replicating the same looks that was showcased in Paris on a size 0 model and placing it beautifully on Queen’s voluptuous frame. Here’s a look back at some of his stunning creations for The Queen.

2009 Oscar Performance

2009 Oscar Red Carpet

2010 Oscar Red Carpet

Blissful Elegance Events Announce Model Search

Daily Venus Diva — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 02:50:39 +0000

How would you like to be the face of Blissful Elegance Events? Well now is your chance. Blissful Elegance Events has just announced a model search where the winner will have the chance to represent the class and sophistication that they are known for. Entering is very easy and if you have any questions, read the official contest rules below:

How To Enter:

The model search which begins on March 10th at 10:00am ends on April 10th, 5:00pm. This gives you an entire month to get your submissions in.
To participate, you must send Blissful Elegance an essay (200-250 words) telling us why you would best represent the Blissful Elegance woman: confident, classy, fabulous and generous. Include your first and last name, complete address, city, state, zip code, telephone number, two pictures in jpeg one head shot the other a full body shot and email address to: beems2010@ymail.com
Only one entry per person/email address. Blissful Elegance is not responsible for entries not received due to difficulties accessing the internet, service outages or delays, computer difficulties or other technological glitches.Only one (1) entry per person. Only one (1) winner per household is permitted.

Eligibility Restrictions:

The contest is open to all women who reside in the New York tri-state area only.
Contestants must be 18 years of age and older.
The contestant must be at least a size 12.
Employees of Blissful Elegance or participating sponsors/promotional partners or the members of their immediate families are ineligible to participate or win.
Contestants are required to provide truthful information and Blissful Elegance will reject and delete any entry that it discovers to be false or fraudulent.
Blissful Elegance will also disqualify and delete any entry received from person under the age of 18.

Prizes:

Three winners will be chosen to receive the following prize package values:

Free gift with a value of at least $40
Featured on the dedicated Blissful Elegance Website and Ning Site
Photo shoot will be on DailyVenusDiva.com (Date to be announced)
If the prize is not claimed by 10:00 on April 17th, it will be forfeited by the winner.

For update and to see our beautiful contestants and ultimately the winners please visit us at: http://beems2010.ning.com

Mo’nique: Her Oscar Win And The Aftermath

News Editor, Cassandra Jones-McBryde — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 22:09:26 +0000

I was really excited when Mo’nique won the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress for her role in Precious, based on the novel Push by Sapphire. I was not alone as the entire audience stood and applauded as she took the stage. She walked poised, controlled and reserved, as if she was told she won the night before and was just waiting for everyone else to hear she won too. Mo’nique’s speech was also controlled and her delivery was strong and defiant. What she wore paid homage to Hattie McDaniel, the first African American to ever win an Oscar. She too was a beautiful curvy woman. She wore a royal blue, floor length gown with a white flower in her hair 71 years prior.

People in their living rooms took apart her speech. Reports swelled during the Oscars online and after the event that Mo’nique was out of line, calling the part of her speech where she thanked the Academy for choosing “performance over politics” disrespectful to the very Academy she was thanking. The press conference after the event Mo’nique again exercised control of her space by making sure those in the press that may have not been so supportive wait in line as she allowed those who had been there from the beginning open up the line of questioning. Of course she was criticized for that too. She is no stranger to this type of ridicule surrounding the movie, having been criticized for not doing a press junket tour like all of the other actors. making only 2 appearances on Oprah, one by Skype and the other in studio. Even Oprah called her looking for her when the film debuted at The Toronto Film Festival, as she admitted on her show recently.

One thing that is undeniable, Mo’nique has always did things her way, never apologizing for who she is. She chose spending time with her family and other business interests over pushing the movie. She stood on the Oscar stage in that beautiful gown, with legs unshaven underneath, embracing the moment and confident in her voluptuous stance. They wanted her to be more humble for her win. Her speech to me said, ” Academy, I dont need your Oscar to validate who I am and what I have done, life has done that already. I acknowledge and appreciate the statement you are making by awarding this Oscar to me”. The statement being that we are now entering an era where you don’t have to be an actress that looks like Meryl Streep, be a size 2 and only have subject matter in movies that is easy to swallow to have consideration. It is about time.

~Cassandra

Lingerie Drawer ReVamp

Daily Venus Diva — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 17:44:17 +0000

Why are we holding on to lingerie and all it encompasses from decades back? Its time to get it together and rid ourselves of ill fitting, faded, falling apart undergarments. Keep in mind the same is true for your nighties, baby dolls, chemises, teddies and negligees. If our lingerie is ill fitting then it defeats the purpose. For some reason we will buy a different size in clothes as our bodies change in one direction or the other, but we have a difficult time doing the same for the undergarments. Throw away any girdle, bras, pajamas, panties, lingerie that is tattered, stained, stretched out, etc. I am an avid believer that this sacred drawer should be purged twice a year.

Start by going to the lingerie department or specialty bra store and get fitted for the proper size bra. Measure your waist and hips to determine your underwear size. Many of us want to pretend the number is irrelevant, but that notion is far from the truth. Based on that lovely info, time to gage what sizes we really need to wear for proper fit. Understanding that without a neat undergarment canvas, whatever is painted on top will not work to its potential.

A neat trick I picked up along the way for women is to take out those bras and matching undies that are still in great shape but don’t fit and place them in a vacuum sealed bag. As we revisit the process and revamp that drawer, down the line our sizes may change. In those cases some of the items in the vacuum bag can get reintroduced into the drawer.

I am an advocate of feeling feminine and sexy under your cloths. Try it, it goes a long way. We can have a bad hair day, have on loungewear or the dreaded fat pants. But with that sexy properly fitting set of undergarments we feel a whole lot better. Now that you know your correct sizes you can pick up great deals when you see them throughout the year. A well-stocked lingerie drawer with good fitting options is the perfect beginning to any fabulous day or night for that matter!

Great Places to Shop for Lingerie include:

About The Author: Victoria Martin II, your modern day B. Smith also referred to as the Urban Martha Stewart, creative mastermind of Catalyst Events and Designs. She is everything Style, a veteran of 12 yrs as Professional Wardrobe Stylist, Events Planner, Interior Decor Consultant, Workshop Facilitator, Author, Mentor, and Hat she wears the proudest-MOTHER!

Women Reveal What They Consider “Plus Size”

Daily Venus Diva — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 11:53:30 +0000

DailyVenusDiva.com, the most trusted online destination and Magazine for Plus Size women recently conducted a survey to determine what women considered plus size. The online magazine that offers daily articles on fashion, health, lifestyle, shopping and many other topics went live on September 1, 2009. They are an authority among the plus size women and are often the first to report on many topics relevant to their curvy reader. The survey, which was posted to the site on February 8, 2010, received many responses. Of the readers who responded to the survey:

0.9% felt that women over a size 10 is plus size
11% considered women wearing a size 12 and up to be plus sizeWith so much attention that the industry is currently receiving, DailyVenusDiva.com feels it is important to address the needs of women as well as get their opinions on a number of topics. At any given time a person visiting DVD will be greeted with a survey that reflects topics that are relevant in the world regarding women.
27% of the readers stated that being plus size depended upon a woman’s body proportions.
While 61% of the readers felt that plus size women should a size 14 or higher.

“Our survey’s give us a chance to stay connected to our readers and bring them articles that they are interested in,” states Editor Stephanie Danforth. “We are thankful for the readers that understand our willingness and dedication to them and in turn are dedicated to us,” she continues.

By providing a magazine that women can visit daily and be greeted with newsworthy content, DailyVenusDiva.com is in a league of its own. Never before has a daily online magazine been so dedicated to giving it’s readers such an array of information that is necessary when thriving in their curves.

Clutter Control In 48 Easy Steps

Editor, Stephanie Penn-Danforth — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 05:09:30 +0000

When it comes to stowing your stuff, we tend to fall into one of two camps: the outies, who keep their things out and within easy reach, and the innies, who hide everything in a closet or inside a drawer. The trick to finding tools and systems that will keep your house in order depends on knowing your personal style.

Before you jump to conclusions, outies aren’t necessarily slobs and innies aren’t necessarily neat freaksNo matter what your personal storage style, you can get it together by checking out our easy clutter control tips.

OUTIE: If you’re an outie, you worry that you’ll forget something if it’s not in plain sight. You work best with organizing tools that provide an instant view of what’s inside. Here are some of ShopSmart’s tips for outies:

Desk: Your ideas flow best when you see what you have around you. But to keep piles and sprawl down:

Hang a shelf. It’s a great use of space, and it helps avoid piles when you run out of desktop real estate.
Organize up. Vertical storage helps you group similar items and keeps the desk clutter-free.

Closet: Using hooks and shelves can help you assess frequently worn clothes fast. Here are some other ways to help you save time and prioritize your stuff:

Let it all hang out. Hang handbags, scarves and belts on a decorative coat rack.
Use cubbies. An open-cube storage system is great for letting you see items at a glance.

Jewelry: Even with jewelry, you want visibility at a glance. Here’s how to keep it looking neat, not cluttered:

Hang it on the wall. Hang a fabric-covered cushion board and drape the jewelry over nails or pins.
Drape it. A specifically designed jewelry tree or even a small sculpture with branching arms looks nice on a dresser and provides the perfect perch for loop earrings and necklaces.

Junk Drawer: If it’s out of sight, it might end up out of mind. Put junk-drawer stuff on display:

Think transparent. Small, see-through glass jars can house change, push pins, rubber bands and more.
Be smart about hooks. Pull items out of the drawer and hang them.

INNIE: If you’re an innie, your priority is having a calm and serene visual slate, so select closed containers in a single hue or pattern for a spare and tidy look. Here are some of ShopSmart’s tips for innies:

Desk: You derive a sense of serenity from a clean, spare work surface. Clutter is distracting. To keep it serene:

Limit the color palette. Keep desk accessories within a limited color range to maintain calm.
Separate your stuff. Use drawer organizers or modular drawer inserts for supplies and papers.

Closet: You need systems that you can trust and that are instinctive and obvious. Grouping like things together is one tried-and-true tactic. Here are some others:

Keep hangers the same. It eliminates visual clutter.
Group clothing by length. It’s an easy way to find stuffy and frees up more floor space.

Jewelry: You like to put things in compartments and behind closed doors, so invest in a nice jewelry box. Or try these other options:

Use two boxes. Keep a small box for the pieces you wear frequently and a larger one to tame and conceal the items you use less often.
Outfit a drawer. Velvet-lined jewelry trays or inserts that fit inside a draw can accommodate everything.

Junk Drawer: By nature, you’re a stasher but you also like things tidy and serene. Here’s how to keep the junk drawer from becoming a jumble:

Divide and conquer. Try using modular drawer organizers that fit their contents precisely.
Make it uniform. Simple organizers with similar shapes will keep the look consistent.

About ShopSmart magazine:
Launched in Fall 2006 by Consumers Union, publisher of Consumer Reports, ShopSmart draws upon Consumer Reports’ celebrated tradition of accepting no advertisements and providing unbiased product reviews.

Skin Recipes: The Humble Art of Zen-Cleansing Yourself

Daily Venus Diva — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 05:01:47 +0000

Pilgrims traveled, pirates pillaged, cowboys rustled, prairie women homesteaded, and explorers sailed from one flat edge of the planet to the other without any need for cuticle cream, pop-up wipes, or volumnizing shampoo-and-conditioner-in-one treatments. And even despite the lack of indoor plumbing, most found adequate ways to keep clean — well, once they realized that bathing was actually good for them.

If you are looking for practical cleaning tips using old-fashioned ingredients, Clean Body will provide you with a full ration of both. Author Michael DeJong, a self-described “clean freak,” takes readers back to the absolute basics of cleanliness. This recipe for zen cleansing skin recipe can be done at home using everyday products.

Recipes

Mix together equal parts of extra virgin olive oil and salt to create a wonderful skin softener. Mix the two, so that the salt soaks up the olive oil, and then scrub your entire body, head to toe. Expect to be energized as well as exfoliated. Massage the mixture into your body and wash off thoroughly. You’d pay good money for this treatment if you were at a spa!
Cut two lemons into super-skinny slivers. Dribble half a dozen drops of olive oil onto the citrus slices. Give it a toss, and finish with three cups of sea salt. Then, it’s hands off while the concoction cures for at least five minutes. Add your citrus dermadip to a hot and steamy bath. Lock the door, put on some soothing music, and submerge yourself into the citrus mix by loosening up and settling down for a long, luxurious, lazy soak. Reappear recharged and revived. You owe yourself this one!
Liberate yourself of dead skin cells with this awesome all-over exfoliator. Blend three quarters of a cup of sea salt or coarse kosher salt, three tablespoons of baking soda, and one-quarter cup of olive oil in a bowl. Jump into a warm-to-hot shower, douse yourself down, dip a washcloth into the mixture, and scrub everything you can reach with the all-over exfoliator. Rinse well. Find your newly revealed, stunningly soft skin sparkling fresh and re-energized.

Michael DeJong, author of Clean Body:The Humble Art of Zen-Cleansing Yourself, is an environmentalist and eco-activist.

Naturally Curly Hair Can Be Cared For Many Ways

Curvy Confidence Editor, Limarie Lewis — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 05:01:16 +0000

Image Source: VenusDiva.com

Naturally Curly Hair and it’s care can be difficult at times. There are tons of websites and videos showing us how to care for it. Many women today have decided to go natural and are either transitioning or have thought about it. Still there are others, myself included who don’t know how to properly care for our curvy-coily strands. Recently I decided that I was going to give myself a little break from major heat styling such as flat ironing so I researched on youtube some naturally curly hair style ideas and just like that I learned that there is a whole other community of curly sisters out there teaching each other how to care for their hair. This to me was almost as inspiring as finding Venus Diva because all the women in the youtube curly community were giving each other tips on how they care for, trim and style their hair. I still have much to learn but was inspired to share with all of my fellow divas some of the great tips that I have learned and that I am trying.

Read labels.

Shampoos that contain sulfates and products with silicones prevent your hair from being well moisturized. Sulfates can be found in laundry detergents and dish washing liquids and strip your hair from its natural oils, causing tangles, split ends and breakage. If you like your current shampoo, make sure to use a small amount and don’t over use it. Shampoo should only be applied to the scalp to remove buildup and not your ends. One great technique I have learned is to pre-shampoo with extra virgin olive oil for an hour or two or as long as you want. Remember curls need lots of moisture so your hair could always benefit from this.

Pre-shampooing.

Before washing with shampoo it is great to pre-shampoo your hair. This involves applying natural oils and deep conditioners on dry dirty hair and letting each hair strand be saturated with butters, creams or oils of your choice. Remember this is done BEFORE shampooing your hair.

If you wear your hair naturally curly, then you know that you have to wet your hair more often than you might like to get fresh curls, this can be very drying to your hair so co-washing is a great alternative.

Co-washing.

Since most shampoos contain harmful sulfates which strip your hair from natural oils needed to keep it strong another method to help prevent dryness and breakage is co-washing. Co-washing is basically washing your hair with conditioner instead of shampoo to keep it moisturized. You can clarify with a shampoo to remove build-up but it is healthier for your hair to use a shampoo that is sulfate free. Still you could always pre-shampoo first and that will help keep your natural curls moisturized.

Use a Leave-In Conditioner.

It doesn’t matter what brand or whether it says leave-in conditioner or not, just as long as you are leaving something in your hair to keep your hair soft and full of moisture…don’t skimp on this. In addition to conditioners, it is great to use a gel or curling mousse in which after detangling with a wide tooth comb you can apply to your hair while it is soaking wet and scrunch. Don’t be afraid of shrinkage! I also learned how to stretch out my curls.

Use a Diffuser.

I never used a diffuser before because I only would rock my curls in the summer when it was too hot or humid to wear it straight so it would just naturally dry, still I would have shrinkage. Since taking this major heat break and wearing my curls out in the winter months I had to learn how to keep my hair moisturized and how to use a diffuser on my curls. A diffuser is a dish shaped attachment usually with fingers that you can attach to your blow-dryer to help dry your curls without frizz, increasing curl definition and volume. Though this is using heat styling it is nowhere near as bad as using the flatiron as often as I was and I learned to really love my curls with the end result, beautiful, curvy, bouncy, shiny, voluminous exotic hair!

Youtube channel taren916 shows you how to diffuse your curly hair and then after shrinkage how to stretch it for volume and length with the blow dryer.

There are tons of curly sisters out there on youtube and other websites showing you how to properly care for your hair and doing product reviews so just in case you didn’t already know, you may want to check them out by searching google and youtube.

The above-mentioned pointers are ones that I have tried for myself and have noticed a remarkable difference in my curl pattern and strength, for those of you who want to grow your hair longer like I do, moisturize those ends everyday especially and embrace your natural hair more often. Hoping this helps, God Bless!

Women Fight Hair Loss With the Help of Dermotologists

Daily Venus Diva — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 14:32:36 +0000

For many, unexplained hair loss can take a significant psychological toll on their overall quality of life. From altering their hairstyle to hide a thinning part to scaling back their hair care regimen in an effort to halt further hair loss, we try countless ways to cover up this problem — and the results are often lukewarm at best. A better option is to see a dermatologist, a physician trained in the care of skin, hair and nails, who can diagnose and, in many cases, successfully treat hair loss in women.

Female-Pattern Hair Loss: Highly Common, Highly Treatable

The most common form of hair loss in women is female-pattern loss, which usually has a strong genetic component that can be inherited from either the mother or father. Also referred to as androgenetic alopecia, this type can start as early as the late teens — and the earlier it starts, the more severe the hair loss tends to be.

Hyperandrogenism: Getting to the Root of this Medical Condition

Hyperandrogenism, a medical condition characterized by excessive production of male hormones (androgens), also can cause hair loss in affected women. The most common cause of hyperandrogenism in women is functional ovarian hyperandrogenism, also known as polycystic ovary syndrome. In addition other signs of this female endocrine disorder include obesity, acne and irregular menstruation, and it is one of the most common causes of infertility.

Cicatricial Alopecia: Preventing Further Hair Loss is Key

Also known as scarring alopecia, cicatricial alopecia is a form of hair loss marked by scarring of the scalp where the source of the hair follicle is destroyed. Unlike other forms of hair loss, cicatricial alopecia results in scattered patches and is usually associated with redness and irritation on the scalp. While there is no known pattern for why this type of loss affects some women, it often occurs when patients have either lupus, an immune system disorder, or lichen planus, an inflammatory skin disease.

“Hair loss is an important concern for a large number of women, and ongoing research in this area will continue to produce effective treatments,” said dermatologist Dr. Mary Gail Mercurio. “Some of the new laser and light-based therapies used for hair loss show promise in preliminary studies. We hope that these technologies will allow dermatologists to further expand our treatment options for all forms of hair loss in the future.”