The Original Cosmo Girl Had It Right

According to the dictionary the word empowerment has become a contemporary buzzword, the word empower is not new, having arisen in the mid-17th century with the legalistic meaning “to invest with authority, authorize.” Shortly thereafter it began to be used with an infinitive in a more general way meaning “to enable or permit.” Both of these uses survive today but have been overpowered by the word’s use in politics and pop psychology. Its modern use originated in the civil rights movement, which sought political empowerment for its followers. The word was then taken up by the women’s movement, and its appeal has not flagged.

Helen Gurley Brown

It may seem like this is an interesting word to use in an article about dating and relationships but in fact it’s quite apropo as it’s something we as women should embrace.

Last month we lost the original Cosmo Girl Helen Gurley Brown, she wrote Sex and the Single Girl and was the original Carrie Bradshaw. However, in truth she was happily married to David Brown for fifty one years. Therefore, I would think she knew a thing or two about making a relationship work. She realized that any good relationship begins in the mirror. That means you have to love what you see and once you truly do then you’re an empowered woman in all areas of your life from work to love relationships.

For far too long plus size women have had a nagging stereotype hanging over us. The stereotype being that because we’re fat, we will accept anything just to say we have a boyfriend, fiance or husband. It’s time we take that idea out to the wood shed and put it out of its misery.

It’s time to take control of our relationships. I’m not referring to Jerry Springer type antics but rather setting the tone for how we want to be treated and not settle for anything less. Every woman is beautiful but the real treasure is in discovering how much you’re worth. So if you’re single and looking for love, don’t jump at the first guy that shows you some interest unless you feel a spark. It may take a while to find the right person but as long as you hold the reigns or have the steering wheel you are in full control of where your life is going.

As for those of you who are in relationships either committed, engaged or married make it your business to keep the spark in your relationship alive. I hear a lot of men complain about high maintenance, demanding women. I certainly don’t think that’s a good idea. However, remind him that you are not a no maintenance woman, it’s easy to fall into a pattern where they take you for granted and no woman wants to feel that if there’s a list of ten things for him to attend to, she comes in at number eleven. That’s when being empowered comes in again. Open your mouth. I don’t condone nagging him all day about it, because lets face it no one likes to be nagged male or female. Nevertheless make your feelings known and keep the lines of communication open. I’d like to conclude with Ms. Brown’s advice on marriage: Marrying well with lots of sex! I always knew I liked this woman, she was one of a kind. May she rest in peace and I hope we are inspired to be empowered at work and in love. It seems the original Cosmo girl had it right.

Crystal P., 2012 Thrive Award Honoree

Plus Night Out Recap: Curvy Fashion & Delicious Treats