The Relationship Between Trust & Insecurity

People often use the words “insecure” & “trust” but something captured my thought on these words today. What exactly is insecurity? Where does it come from and how does trust have anything to do with insecurity? So I began my research of their definitions which I will breakdown below in order to somehow address some of the above questions which peaked my interest.

Insecurity:

· Lack of confidence or assurance; self doubt & a quality or state of being insecure.
· Being subject to fears or doubts, uncertainty, uneasiness, anxious.
· Being exposed or liable to risk, loss, or danger, not secure.

Hold that thought, let’s move on to defining the word “trust”…

Trust:

· Reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
· To rely upon or place confidence in someone or something (usually followed by in or to ): to trust in another’s honesty; trusting to luck.
· To have trust or confidence in; rely or depend on.

What I noticed here is that both deal with the word confidence. Where insecurity is a lack of confidence, trust is relying on strength or confidence. So it is no surprise to me that insecurity can in fact be a result of lack of trust. But wait, in reading the definitions of the words again, I noticed that “insecurity” is lack of confidence or self doubt which is not being able to trust yourself, but instead being subject to your fears. “Trust” on the other hand, is defined above as being able to rely on the strength or integrity of a person or thing. So does insecurity come from not trusting oneself?

There are many people who deal with insecurity, or lack of confidence on a daily basis. Some have been hurt in the past or betrayed in relationships, others have been put down or dismissed by others but whatever the case may be whether fat or skinny, rich or poor, male or female, married, single or dating there is still this solid strand with these ingredients that lend to our character, confidence, security & trust.

So how do we overcome insecurity?

The answer is different for everyone. Knowing what these words mean to you and what role they play in your lives is essential to knowing what or who it is you are putting your trust in. Everyone is different but where and who you put your trust in is crucial. I notice that whenever I put my trust in people or things that are not stable, I always fall short but when I put my trust in the Lord I feel most secure and unshaken. This is not a one- time assignment for me, every day I have to make this decision…will I trust in myself and my abilities knowing that I too fall short? Will I trust in others and what they can do for me, knowing that sometimes people fail you or will I place my trust in God knowing that he can do all but fail?

The decision though sometimes difficult to make is obvious and leads to clear results. So I choose to put my trust in the Lord knowing that He is the key to my confidence, and who helps me to overcome any and all of my insecurities. He leads me in the direction that I need to go in order to stay victorious is positive thinking. Strange as this may sound, He helps me to trust myself but also to rely on Him.

The world might say I am fat, ugly, old or worthless. People may mistreat me or abandon me in times of great need but my security comes from God. Funny, even though I wrote this piece just trying to break down the meaning of these words and my understanding of them, I realized that I needed to know for myself why it is that sometimes even though I am confident, I can be insecure. So placing my trust in God and committing to growth and self awareness is an everyday process. We are all on a journey in this beautiful thing called life so let’s strive to make it a happy one filled with nothing but positive thinking and growth!

Today is a good day to think about who or what you have been relying on? You might find that you may need to remove some people or ways of thinking from your life. You may have to step outside of your comfort zone to gain some success in whatever it is you are pursuing. But whatever you decide, I challenge you this year to start changing the way you see yourself, you are amazing and were designed for healthy growth. Step over your fears and try new things, meet new people & enjoy your own company from time to time if you already don’t. Self reflection is a great way to get you on that path to victory over things that may be holding you back, so go ahead & THRIVE! Peace, love and blessings to you this new year!

About Curvy Confidence Editor, Limarie Lewis

Limarie Lewis is a Philadelphia native recording artist known as Poetikmind with her independent critically acclaimed album titled "Deep Thoughts Defined". She is a wife, stepmother, poet, writer, Sunday school teacher, administrative assistant and aspiring plus model with a BA in Elementary & Special Education. Limarie enjoys working with youth and empowering women of all ages to love themselves for who they are because they are fearfully and wonderfully made. www.modelmayhem.com/poetikmind

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