Dear Olga,
I cannot stand it at my job. I am the ‘only’ curvy girl in the office, maybe our whole floor. Where are all of my plus size sisters/co-workers at?? I hate having lunch around them so I eat by myself in the small kitchen pantry in my floor. I don’t do the lunch meet & gossip that all the other ladies get to enjoy.
I started eating with them at first but then all they did was eat salad and just talk about the dangers of gaining weight or getting fat. They would make the most nasty fat jokes and laugh at me not with me. It got bad when they got the men in our office involved.
This has been going on for almost two years. I have a good salary and I love my job just hate everyone i work with!
Just wanted to know what you would do in this situation. I live alone and I cannot quit this job. This job provides very well for me. Please provide me with some insight.
Rianni
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Dear Rianni,
I have looked at the picture you attached to me in your email and yes you are a big girl..but such a beautiful girl! I know some of those girls at the office don’t have one third of the pretty you got going on. Sweety, you think that all they noticed is your fat thighs..oh no darling..they have noticed that amazing clear skin you have on that gorgeous face. Do not let them put you in a place..you go as you please and you belong in that cafeteria eating your lunch as you please.
Why are you hiding?? Never let them see you sweat..in other words..shine.If you love who you are and you don’t second guess yourself..why are you doing it now? Because of a bunch of bully, not so attractive thinner girls. That is not a good enough excuse for me.
They can stay in their ignorant world you have a life to live and you are a hard working woman making it happen with a career you love.
I would suggest you can go and report them to you job. But this would show them that they won. That you are being affected by their words and actions. Don’t you dare give them that idea. No. Just ignore them. You tried to be nice and the perfect co-worker well not its time for plan B. If they happen to pass by your desk and say hi, well you can return the greeting. But that is it. You don’t go out of your way to be pleasant to people that have made you the joke of the office. If one of the those nasty girls just happens to sneeze and you are the only one there..don’t waste your breath on that bless you. Keep it moving and show her that its not just her world.
Smile..don’t always wear ‘black’ put them curves of yours in some spring colors! And as far as the men go. They are probably going by the rumors those nasty office girls are saying. Say hello to them and let them see the real you.
In a few days hit me up and let me know how things are. Stay beautiful and curvy.Rianni.
Curvaciously Yours,
Olga Gonzalez-Ramos
Olga Ramos -- Daily Venus Diva.
I love your response! I’m sure many girls go through this, not only at work but in classrooms. This will help them resolve the issue!!
I love your response here Olga…especially about wearing colors and putting your curves on display. One thing I love to remind myself whenever I am feeling down or insecure is that “I am fearfully and wonderfully made…we all are!” We all have our days when we don’t feel cute or beautiful but we have to remember the things that make each one of us unique and embrace those things. There is NOONE out there like YOU, not even if you had a twin! I don’t know what you look like my sister but I can assure you that whenever other women choose to point out perceived “flaws” on other people that just points out how insecure they really are about themselves! Be you! The real beauty of a woman radiates from within and being comfortable in her own skin. It is hard to get comfortable when the world has this one-sided view of what makes women beautiful but one thing I have learned is that beauty really does come from within, whether you are thick or thin. There are girls out there with amazing figures that some women would literally die to have with ugly attitudes and that makes them ugly. I remember my husband telling me years ago that a lot of the “pretty skinny girls” he talked to over the years were really just conceited and insecure…which surprised me because for a while, I thought they had it made but I was wrong. I love my smaller sisters as well but don’t think for one second just because they are all skinny where you work that they are all confident, you’d be surprised. It sounds like you have a lot going for you at your job financially but abuse should not be accepted just like Olga said but don’t allow someone else to dictate how you are going to act, trust your best judgement and go from there. I say all of this to say..stay where you are, this is a test in your beautiful peronality. Don’t let anyone get you down and don’t hide your curves celebrate them! Wear something that will make you feel good about yourself everyday whether it be a new lipgloss, earrings or clothes. Write a list of things you love about yourself on some post-its and stick them on your mirror so you can see them everyday and continue to shine like the beautiful woman you are! Peace & God Bless!
They see Royalty in your beauty as they age with Envy and Hate. Walk that Walk sis!
I agree with Olga’s comments. To hell with your coworkers! Let your beauty shine both inside and out!
I WOULD COME IN WITH SOME HOME COOK FOOD AND MAKE THE OFFICE SMELL SO GOOD AND TAUGHT THEM LOL GREAT ADVICE OLGA
Hi Girls,
Thanks so much for this huge and positive response (smiling so big now)! It means so much to me to be able to help others when that time comes calling.
Your positive feedback and support saved the day once again.
Rianni loved my response and the energy you all gave her…with opened arms..and no questions asked.
You all make this magazine what it is..a real magazine on the life of a BIG girl.
Thrive in your CURVES..spread the word.
Curvy hugs,
Olga~
Lifestyle Editor
DVD Magazine
Hi Olga I hope you don’t mind me adding to this. I know I am a man here. I know what its like being different. I have been made fun of all my life. I know it hurts but it has tought me to live my life th way I want. And that is to love everyone and ot forget the ones that hurt me. Cause I know there is people out there that do appreciate me and like for who I am not what I look like or how much money I have. Like I say hearts should be shared not left alone. And Rhianna sweetie rightnow your heart is aone but as you can read here our hearts want to share with yours. And By the way. You are very attractive and beautiful woman. All my life I have been with beautiful Divas like you. My GF right now is one and I only date women like her and you. So lift your head up get out of that closet and show them who you are. If you have to shove it back in there face. When they make fun them back but at them but with their comments. All BBW women are goddesses and goddesses sould betreated like goddesses not like slaves. thankyou for letting me speak.
Craig